welcoming 21, hehe

Hello, my dear fellas. It's almost 9 pm here. Well, I had PORANTI today in Sekar Futsal Club. PORANTI is like... errr... you know you and your friends in campus held fun sport session in a week. It is followed by our juniors and seniors in the same department, yes yes English Department. This year, we become the host or committee for PORANTI. It's so fun to have such an occasion. I'm so proud to be a part of this program. :)

Well, we from year 2010, so far get the first place in Tug of War championship for girl and boy category and the newest achievement we got the first place in Girls Futsal. Hehehe I must be on that team today, but seems I didn't have to do it, tho. My friends are strong enough to cover 2012-team's attacks. They were a bit difficult to defeat. :D

Anyway, you are doing great, Guys! :)

Hehehe it's October 31st, right? You know, tomorrow will be my day. I hope so. Hahaha :p

Ugh, I have to take a bath now. Hahaha yeah, I haven't done it since this morning! Okay, wish us luck for our basket final tomorrow. We'll get that "Juara Umum" predicate! Yes, it should be! AMEN.

See you around, folks. Be good. :)

one point 5

Hi, hi, Fellas. Long time no see. See you guys again in this October. Well, November will come in no time and it's gonna be my month. Yeeeeeeaaaayyyy!!! *smirk*

Okay, okay, off of this topic. Now, I want to tell you guys about my 26th-day-in-every-month. So, two days ago I had my relationship for one and a half year. Yeeeaaahhh! Hahahahaha I'm so happy that I could fly!

Yep, I don't want to be that 'alay' creature or couple since I, ALWAYS, celebrate my monthly anniversary in 26. Yet, it always be our routine and we can't stop! No, that's our ritual. Even we often don't have a proper celebration and it's not always at the exact date. We can just chill out at date 27 or 28. It's just 'monthly anniversary', not a big deal. And why I always do this kind of thing every month, cause I need to 'evaluate' what we've been through. What we've done. What we've felt each other. We have to talk about this and criticize each other if necessary. We are not that kinda romantic couple, though. Nooo, we're just like brother and sister sometimes, best friend, silly couple (most time), well...

We might meet everyday, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, always be together anytime anywhere. However, we'll spare a special time to our own. Just the two of us. Talking about us now and then, even we talk about the others. :D

My dear folks, it's midnight here. I'll see you guys later here. Keep subscribing. Be good! Gutten Nacht. :)

Sunday morning rain is not falling

Hello, hiiiiii. Pfffttt, it's Sunday anyway. Sunday morning exactly. I don't know what I'm thinking about, but I just want to type something here. Well, my room is back to normal, although there still ashes or dirt in particular place. I just changed my bed cover and it's strawberry on it. :D

By the way, I'm going to be 21 soon. Heheheheh that's not the point though. I remembered someone ever said that maturity comes when you are 21 years old. I don't know, since here in Indonesia 17 years old can be considered that you are mature enough to decide your own future. I think it depends on the actor who does it whether they want to do it now or later. Honestly, I haven't decided my future yet. Yep, I don't have a certain goal for my life. What I want to be in the future or where I have to go to make my life better. I don't know what I have to be...

Pathetic.

I think many or even most of people around the world still can't imagine what they want to be in the future. Soon, when I graduate from this Uni, I want to have a job. Anything. I want to have my own salary and fulfill my own needs, etc. Simple as it is. Yet, actually I'm scared of what happens next, I'm not ready yet for it. Hhh, I also haven't found a good topic for my thesis. Aaarrghhh, @#$%^&!

My boy and I are still wondering what we will do after graduation. He said, he wants to get a job, a proper job with a good salary. If it is possible, I want to take S2. It may take 5 or 6 years and we'll marry. Hehehe ameeen. But only God know what will happen in the future. We human just could prepare and plan what best for us.

I must be out of mind or something. Please, Nying. It's Sunday. It's morning. It's 10:05! Go back to your bed and arrange your future!
 

Okay, off of this topic, we'll talk again later. Happy weekend. :)

almost vanished by the fiiiiire *doo bee doo bee doo bee doo bee doo*

Waaaks, hello bloggers. Long time no see :D

It happened approximately thirteen hours ago, rainy outside, totally blackout, hot air, panicked, nervous, lalala yeyeye. -_-

I only had candles in my room when the blackout occurred. Well, this is sooo yesterday but I have no choice. I don't really like being in a dark room, rainy, the temperature is raising, in this such situation. I. Really. Hate. This. Really.

So, I burned two candles and placed them in a plastic bowl and I filled a little water in it. One was succeed, but the other was failed. The bowl was wet and I couldn't dry it by any utensils around me. So, I just placed it on the top of a plastic candy jar. The one in the plastic bowl started to melt away and gone. The other one still was survive, but it was just about 5 cm long. 'Oh, it won't be long. I'll prepare another one and burn it,' my brain said.

And, fuck.

I fell asleep.

Feeling so exhausted, torridity, panicked, nervous, scared, etc etc. Previously, I put the candles on the table. The table is made from wood and I leave a 5-cm-long burning candle on it aaaaand I overslept. Guess what happened next? Yes, yes, the table is BUUUUURRRNNNEEEDDD!

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKKKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh. God. Why?

It's relieved that it burned a little part of the table top, not the whole thing. This is so kampret and I could just put out the fire using anythings around my hands. I hit it with plastic fan, pour it with water from the plastic bowl. Yeah, the fire started to go out and I covered the burned area with sajadah. :|

I just reach everything near me and put on the fire. I'm totally panicked and nervous. If only you guys could hear my heartbeat. It was rushing. Good thing the fire is gone, although I have to let my sajadah go. Well, it's the saddest thing, though...

I only relied the light from my cellphone to clean things and cover it. The ashes, burned things (my bracelets, my two bottles of nail polish, everything I cherish more :'(), the newspaper, plastic things around the burned area, even my tosca purse were thrown away. Yes, I have to do this, because those things are burned. Thank God, the money is saved, so I can continue my life here. Poor thing, the motorcycle keys of Apin's and my boy's and the STNK of Apin's motorcycle are burned. Not the whole area, it just a little part of its corner. I must be so careless, sloppy, yeah whatever it is. Now, I have to find a good answer if Apin asks later why her things are burned. Help me! :'(

I won't use the little candle in a short time I guess. Ummm, may be a big one with a sturdy base and I place it on an anti-burned mat. I should buy one as soon as possible, considering I can't afford the emergency lamp which can be charged and used when the blackout is occurred. Rainy season is coming, blackout will come often. I should prepare one though. :)

Well, wish me luck. It does make me cautious. Be careful with burning things, fire, candles, whatever they are. Don't leave it alone and you must be 100000000% awake to make sure if the burning candle almost runs out. I've cleaned the mess last night, at that time. Mop the floor once the power is on. Ugh, my room was totally messy. Ashes everywhere, the ceiling is covered with spiderweb and ashes, burned smell everywhere, burned smoke, aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhh totally fucked! :|

The post is untidy, swearing, ah I'm depressed, but I'm okay. Oh what I'm thinking about... Well, be good, Fellas. Always be alert and 100% awake for every situation.

See you around. :)

I got nothing but love to give :D

Hehehe hello, Fellas. I'm listening to Far East Movement featuring Cover Drive's song now. You know, that "Turn Up the Love" song. Very easy listening, I love the song from the first time I saw the video clip on TV. Very cool! :D

Well, I'm no longer in a state where I always feel guilty towards my high school best friend. Yes yes, that person who I tell you in the previous post. You know, best friend never ends! Just talk to them what you really feel, no worries, no guilty feelings, no boundaries, no problems. Happily ever after, amen. :)

By the way, this is my first post in October, right? Hahaha where have I been? Sorry, I don't have enough time to update this blog, since there are so many presentations and their friends which I have to conduct it. Today, I (think) am successfully presenting my task, with my friends of course, in Pranata Masyarakat Inggris dan Amerika class. Although, I'm not really good in presenting a material and still have the handout in my hands and read it, in front of the class. Horrible! However, I still can handle the presentation, well, a little nervous here and there though. It's a big success. My lecturer says it was good, although it takes a long time to present all the materials. Hehehe good thing it all ends with a good mark. *winking* *winking* *winking*

Today also, I have PLU test with Culayla, one of my partners in Pranata presentation. The test is actually easy, super easy. But what on earth, how could I not bring my notes from my third semester when I first time I take the subject??? HOW COULD I? I have my answers wrong two numbers in matching number test. WHAT? What the heck! -_-

I have two, eeerrr actually one and a half meetings with my friends in the afternoon, after I took the exam. Well, this is a super tired day. Gotta reply my friend soon. Wish me luck for my Media presentation tomorrow. See you around, Fellas. MWAH! ;)

I don't know, I just feel like I'm broken heart :(

Hello, hello. Good evening, Fellas. Well, I'm not broken heart literally. I mean, my boyfriend and I are okay, we are totally okay. It's not about us though. I'll tell about 'her'. We were very good acquainted in the back days. Very very good.

I don't know exactly 'what's going on' about us. We are really really really different than we were in the old days. We used to hang out together, chill out, having lunch and whatsoever. It is just too bad realizing we are not that close anymore. You know, since I get acquainted with my boyfriend, she is not that welcome. I know, that's my fault, my weakness, ah whatever. One thing I'm not really sure about her is what's about her then? She's just not good enough than me. And why she exaggerates to blame me and so on! I don't really get her. She is so... complicated.

I know, it's so coward to write this on blog. I just don't understand her. I really love her, back in time we were very best friend and I still do. You know, it's like reciprocal relationship between us. Let's make an analogy. She does the similar thing as I do. She goes through similar events as I do. The result is we are just the same. The question then is why does she feel higher than me and humiliate me so damn bad? She's not that great though.

I don't hate her. No, I'm just disappointed. I feel like I'm not worth her enough to be friends. She's not the one I knew back in time. She's different. Totally different. I don't like her to be different. Yet, that's her right. You know that Gotye's song titled "Somebody I Used to Know", I feel that it's sooo me. No, it's sooo us. Ah, what am I thinking? :/

She will never hear me. She just does what she likes and ignores what people say. If only I can talk to her like we used to. I can just call her and chew her out. It may be rude or something, but I just don't like the way she is! I feel like I don't know her anymore. What's so wrong about caring to your friend? Your high school best friend? She is the typical girl that if I criticize her, she will attack me. She'll criticize me brutally. It's okay, even it's normal insulting your best friend like addressing them bitch, slut, or whatever it is. It becomes rude or unusual to insult your best friend like they are lower than you. It is brutally not normal! I said it's rude! It's not a normal conversation between your friend. It's judging!

I know it will not stop or even end my anger or solve the problem. I just need to decrease the level of my anger. It's not even worth it to angry to her. Well, who am I? You know, Gotye's song. It's her right. I don't have the authority to control her life and change her what I want her to be. I just oppose the way she is not the way she lives!

Long night. Good night, Bloggers. Be good :)

2nd September (with you)

So, this is our second September of our relationship. Hihi nothing's special, no celebration though. We're just spending time together, chatting and so on. I love we are being together in every moment and event. Our prayers never stop. Just wish us best for the rest of our life. God never stop listening. Happy weekend! :)

quote of the day

People always judges and complaints about things, you do too. Sometimes, they're arguing and take a blame on each other, you do too. We are not weak, we just sometimes lose hopes. Keep struggling and face your day. Be good, Fellas.

cold evening and everything

Hello, this is me again. As always, I've been spent my whole afternoon until now in front of my room browsing in internet. Hehehe if there is a way, why do I not get through it? Well, since there such a facility here to access internet, wi-fiii for freee, YEAAAHHH! Okay, I'll just get to the point. I won't take a long post, just a few paragraphs. I love writing! :D

Oh, I smell terasi. You know terasi? It is an ingredient, I mean a very crucial ingredient if you want to make spicy sauce a la Indonesian a.k.a sambel ulek. Woh, that is crazy! Indonesian people can't live I think without sambel in their daily meals. You know, it's like there is something missing in your life. It's not complete. Sambel is like a missing puzzle which can make your whole life perfect. YEAH! :D

I must be so empty and missing to eat that kinda spicy food. Ugh!

Off of this topic, then. :)

Well, I'll show some pictures. Keep silent. See it. Feel it.

  

Sooooo, this is my man. My half. My everything. My reason to smile. My strength. Hehehe I don't ask you to describe him whatsoever. I just want to show you, this man. He might not be as perfect as prophet or as handsome as those guys out there, even they are not perfect though. But, I love the way he loves me, the way we talk about future or anything, I love everything about him! You know, everything. :)

We do love beaches, movies, foods, songs, and so on. We might have different taste of a thing. If it was me, it depends my mood. If it was him, it depends on his mood and me. :p

It might be too risky to show these pictures of him, but I don't care. There are always been ways to solve it. :)

I always like to see his face. I love those eyes of him. His smile. His laughter. Long and thin arms of him. I love it! I hope we can have such a happy life, a long last relationship, a good future, everything. Amen.

in sunset we trust...

Good afternoon, Love. How are you? It's nice to see you again. I only remember the walks and paths we take up to this level. Well, it's not easy, you know it, too. We just don't stop trying and trying. We keep trust each other. Something that everyone can't have. I only remember the way you take my hands, grab it and grip tightly. It's warm, I like it so much.

I remember the last time I feel so insecure and restless. Why do I feel that way since you're always next to me? One thing I know for sure, I'm such a possessive-insecure-childish girl. You can imagine how it feels. I only remember I stare at you with damp eyes, watery nose, my mouth closed-tight, and my head starts to blow up!

But then, we talk. We talk about things. Many things. Talking, talking, talking. I only remember your arms around me. Warm. Peaceful. Safe.

random post. hehehe :p

Hello, Bloggers. I just want to tell you something about 'bottle'. Wait... what? Yes, yes, bottle. That slim and not so big nor so small thing made from plastic which can be filled with water or any liquid. I have two in my boarding house. Sometimes, I just feel exhausted and drink water as much as I could. Well, that's not the point. I usually boil my own drink. Yes, yes, you can say take water from the water tap and boil it until voila! You can drink it when it is warm or less warm. I filled my two bottles with the boiled water and took it to the refrigerator. A few days later, I found one of my bottles is half empty (the other bottle is in my room). Wow, wow, wow. Well, well, well. I'm getting robbed! *swearing, swearing, swearing*

There are so many precious and luxurious things in my boarding house, but why this silly robber spend a half water in my bottle?! What so hard to ask me or even tell anybody else here to share it. I don't take it seriously anyway, I just don't like her action. Yep, I'm sure the suspect is female, since only a few males come here and I'm really really sure, they will not have the courage to drink my water. EEEEERRRRGGGGHHHH! Oh, man, this is getting serious.

Okay, so I just threw my anger to Apin and my boyfriend. I complaint everything. Luckily, they want to hear my statement and also give me suggestion to name my bottles. I mean I write my name on each bottle. Also I add a note on the bigger bottle like: "YOU WANT? ASK ME. JUST DON'T TRY TO STEAL THE WATER!"

Ridiculous? Childish? Yes, I know. I just don't like the way they steal and in-appreciate my effort to make my healthy water. They are just the same with robbers out there. @#$%^&*

happy 16 months :)

Aloha, bloggers. Hihihihi miyanhae for being such irresponsible blogger and writes nothing for the past 4 months. Well, I'm good and always be good. Since there are so many good people around me, they are so sweet! >.<

I didn't do much for the past 4 months. I just moved here and there, go to the campus, hang out with my friends, chill out with my boy *hihihi :p*, back to my hometown, do the Ramadhan fasting, having a great Eid Mubarak, many more! Oh one more thing. I don't have a proper long holiday in the last holiday, because I have my internship done in Ramadhan! Whoa, I must be full of joy and being a holy girl this year. Hahaha :p

My internship was fun. The head of the HRD is very nice to us. Why 'us'? I didn't do it by myself for sure. I have Martha who always picked me up and she is very helpful to me along  the internship, Shinta and Fajar also. We had such a good-nice-easy-light internship ever! We just reviewed the book, create the outline, edit the book content and sleep. FYI, we have the internship in Tiga Serangkai, the biggest book publisher in Solo. I recommend you to have the experience in this field, since book is never end. I mean, book is always made, published, created and so on, so working in publisher will guarantee you. One thing for sure, we must be creative, hard working, keep spirit and never give up. Life is mean. If you don't try your best, you will not survive. :)

Haha, how can I be so wise? XD

My bad, I almost forgot. Eid Mubarak for you all. Let's forgive each other and make a better living now and in the future. Back to the zero. *indolish :p* :)

Mom and Dad are doing well, too. Although, they just had the hard time while I'm here in Solo. I feel such a bad daughter to them when I know the secret they always keep. It's relieving the 'trouble maker' is out and never approach my family. Just dare to do that and I'll shoot them in the head. I just don't get them. My family was and is always very nice to them, but why they act like they don't care about it and do the bad things? The saddest thing is I always think that they are sincere and the others are bad. The fact, they are just the same and hurt my family. They don't even have the courage to apologize to my mother! But my mother does. She is the most sincere and kind woman in the world. I love her more than anything. :')

How's my nephew doing? He is good, of course, very good. His father is in the house now from his job in yacht and his mother always spare her time while finishing her thesis. Fadil can run now and always move here and there, roll here and there, giggling everywhere, make a mess in my room and always do. I know he just wants my attention and plays with him. Owkay, you sell, I buy! Hahahahaha :p

You know, I have the most precious time of my life *hyperbole? well, it's your problem, then. :p*. I just celebrated my relationship with Praditya Ramadhan a.ka my missing puzzle yesterday. We are a happy-16-months couple, hehe. Well, I am always happy anyway if it is with him. Just like what he said,"My love for him grows." I always want an ordinary relationship, but God sent him to me in an extraordinary way. We are not always happy, we also have the hard times, but we fix it as quick as we could. I don't really like in such 'moment of silence' situation with him or fight with him. I hate it! So much! Why fight if we can just talk about the problem and solve it? A relationship works if we keep the communication well. No cheat, no lie, no worries, no mistakes, no problems. :)

Good night, people. See you around. :)

3 days to go to 260420131332 :)

Holla, it's been days since my last post last month. Hehehe just go complaint to my lecturer for giving me such a giant bucket of tasks. I do apologize, okay ;)

Well, I won't talk (or write?) something serious now. I just want to inform you that I will have my first anniversary soon. Hihihi just wait. :)

I'm so excited that I'm afraid I can't sleep well preparing all 'our' plans. Yeah, we have prepared many things. The best one is cooking time! Just the two of us. We don't deal the best one recipe yet, but my man wants the Mexican. Wow, it will be great then! <(o'u'o)>

Hopefully we can have a great anniversary then. Wish us luck. :)

awesome little nephew (´⌣`ʃƪ)

Halo Bloggers, hehe ketemu lagi. Itung-itung bayar utang yang kemaren. Hampir 6 bulan ye absen ga ngeblog. Pheeew, sibuk ciyn jadi ga sempet. Ehehehehe *alesan* :p

Well, uda pernah liat belom ponakan aku yang menakjubkan? :)

Hehehe kenapa menakjubkan? Karena dia adorable banget, meskipun baru 15 bulan  umurnya. Lucuuu banget bocahnya, pengen tukeran pipi aja deh kalo uda liat pipinya. Baiklah, saya perkenalkan ponakan saya yang ganteng, please welcome, Fadhil Audzah Mudakkir. :)

Hihihi itu cover Facebook aku. Kalo diurutin sih itu waktu dia masih umur 8 bulan. Masih belum bisa jalan, jadi manusia iler, minta gendong mulu, jadi kesayangan tante-tante, oom-oom, pakdhe budhe, eyang-eyangnya. Maklum yah dia cucu pertama di keluarga bapak sama mamah aku. Jadi anak emas deh di rumah. :')

Lahir di Jombang, 12 Desember 2011. Dulu pas masih bulan-bulan awal suka sakit gitu, kasian banget deh Fadhil. Yep, jadi panggilannya Fadhil ya. Mamahnya sih manggil dia Zakki kalo cerita ke keluarganya yang di Makassar.

Aku kasih liat yah pas dia umur tujuh hari. Kecil bangeeet... (≧◡≦)

Kek cewe yah pas baru lahir. Bahkan, pas uda umur lima bulan masih suka dikira cewe. Padahal ini cowo tulen loh anaknya, emang sih masih suka nangis. :D
Tapi dia pinter ko. Nurut. Kalo digendong sama orang yang baru ketemu gitu dia ga nangis. Ga rewelan, paling kalo pas sakit aja baru rewel. Oh iya ini pas dia umur  1 bulan, 3 bulan, 4 bulan, 5 bulan dan 6 bulan. Kenapa yang 2 bulan ga ada? Karena belum sempet poto dan ga ada yang motoin. Gapapa ko, tetep okeh meskipun ada yang kelewatan. Ponakan aku tetep ganteng tanpa cela. *woelah* \(‾▿‾\) (/‾▿‾)/

Suka banget deh liat dia lagi ketawa gitu, meskipun ompong yah. Wkwkwk dia baru tumbuh gigi sekitar umur tujuh bulan. Sebelum tumbuh gigi si Fadhil inih suka gigit-gigit benda atau apapun yang ada di deket mulutnya. Apalah tangan, jari, pundaknya mamah, mainannya dia, digigitin sama dia. Pas belum tumbuh gigi sih geli-geli gitu. Gitu tumbuh gigi, alahmaaak, sakitnyaaa... Sampe ngebekas gigi kelinci gitu di tangan. Kecil-kecil sadis. :'(

ini foto paporitnya pacar akuh.

foto sama ayah dan bunda ;)

gigi yang bisa bikin cap gigi kelinci Щ(ºДºщ)

Sekarang ini Fadhil dirawat sama Mamah di rumah. Yah kan emang orangtuanya belum punya rumah sendiri, jadi masih tinggal jadi satu sama Mamah. Karena mas Fafan a.k.a ayahnya Fadhil kerja di luar negeri dan mbak Nurul alias bundanya bocah ini kuliah S2 di Solo, Fadhil dititipin deh ke Mamah. Kalo pagi sampe siang gitu ada pengasuhnya di rumah, kan Mamah kerja. Alhamdulillah sih orangnya telaten dan cekatan kalo ngurus Fadhil. Tau sendiri kalo anak uda mulai belajar jalan dan uda mulai bisa jalan, tingkahnye kek bola. Gerak sana, gerak sini. Ga ada capeknya, yang capek malah yang ngurusin. Termasuk aku kalo lagi di rumah, bagian sie repot deh. :3

Fadhil sama aku uda klop banget. Pernah lho gara-gara aku tinggal balik ke Solo, dia nangis gitu. Eh besoknya malah sakit panas. Kangen kali ye sama aku. Hiks, kalo bisa dibawa gitu mah aku bawa deh ke Solo. Kantongin tas ransel gitu :"""""""(

Ini foto-foto dari bulan Maret awal kemaren pas aku pulang ke rumah. Dia inih suka banget masuk keranjang baju terus digeret muter-muter rumah. Pertamanya sih dulu Mamah yang iseng masukin Fadhil ke keranjang baju pas aku setrika baju orang serumah. Eh, malah dia kesenengan. Nah, kalo dia mulai rewel dan aku juga uda capek ngikutin dia merangkak apa jalan gitu, masukin keranjang baju aja deh. Beres. :D

Sekian, sekilas tentang ponakan akuh. Hihihi ini cuma sebagian aja koleksi foto-fotonya. Sebenernya sih masih banyaaaaaaaak banget di leptop aku. Pas tanggal 09 maret kemaren dia sempet maen ke Solo sama Mamah. Tapi bentar banget. Ga ada 24 jam. Yah cuma jenguk bundanya aja sih, kasian ga bisa pulang. Uda kangen banget katanya. Nanti kalo jadi mamah-mamah, aku juga gitu kali ya kalo ga bisa ketemu anak aku... :')

Oke Bloggers, sekian post kali ini. See you around! :*

Eh, ini aku kasih oleh-oleh. ;)

cucok kaaaaan? ♪(´ε` )